jadedofmara @jadedofmara@scifi.fyi

hey guys here's #5things about me!
I'm

#queer
#chronicallyill / #chronicillness
#colorado
#taekwondo
#designer

(that last one is a lie. I would like to be. I've done some things. that's it.)

ANTONI AND BOBBY ARE BASICALLY INTERCHANGABLE

im a queer girl and yet the fab five are trying to assassinate me....

"nothing but logo tees" HEY its called sadgirl butch but single and its a LOOK

arent you glad glee was cancelled before despacito

why is the accepted theory bigger luke and not smaller han

sad realization of today: any girl who is out enough to be visible to me probably already has a girlfriend ... :(

" howdy im a cowboy musician and i have something to say about politics "

this is weird but a strapless bra with a non-strapless outfit is really nice and comfy.

who has better fistfights, football or american football

brodys angry
hes all like "fuck it"
he takes a harpoon and welds it to a rocket
jaws last words are "whoa. respect"
then he explodes and its a pretty good effect WHOA

JAWS IS DEAD
LONG LIVE JAWS
HE WAS A SHARK WITHOUT A CAUSE
HE WAS IN A MOVIE A MOVIE CALLED JAWS
JAWS IS DEAD
LONG LIVE JAWS
HE WAS A SHARK WHO FOUGHT THE LAW
HE WAS IN A MOVIE THAT EVERYONE SAW
AT THE ACADEMY AWARDS HE WAS ROBBED
JAWS IS DEAD
LONG LIVE JAWS

(SHARKS EXIST
IN REAL LIFE)

brody's like "youre gonna need a bigger boat"
so they go back home and get a bigger boat
the biggest boat thats ever sailed
gonna kick jaws's ass
or i guess... his tail? (yeah his tail)
but OH MY SHIT
JAWS JUMPS OUT
AND QUINT GETS BIT
right in half like a kitkat bar
up in the sky theres a shooting star
(thats quint up in heaven. hes a star now)

JAWS IS HERE
HERE IS JAWS
HE IS A SHARK WHO FIGHTS THE LAW
HE WAS IN A MOVIE THAT EVERYONE SAW

theyre out on the sea
they wait all night
where could jaws be
hes nowhere in sight
dreyfuss decides to go down in a cage
and JAWS SHOWS UP IN A FULL ON RAGE
he tears up the cage like paper in a shredder
while dreyfuss makes his wetsuit wetter
he hides behind a rock like a cowardly prick
and doesnt show up til the end of the flick!

now the mayors dead
so brody's in charge
he knows the real killer
is still at large
so he and dreyfuss make a decision
theyre going on a mission
theyre gonna go fishin
for jaws!
a man named quint lets them use his boat
on the condition that he be the one to cut jaws's throat
cause he was a sailor back in world war two
and jaws ate his entire crew!

well
JAWS IS HERE
HERE IS JAWS
HE IS A SHARK WITHOUT A CAUSE
HE IS FROM A MOVIE A MOVIE CALLED JAWS

long story short: the beach gets closed
the mayors like "ok yeah this blows"
suddenly jaws has got a price on his head
but the wrong little shark baby ends up dead
it was jaws's little brother! now he's pissed
the mayor just shot to the top of his list
he sneaks into his house in the middle of the night
and eats that fucker in a single bite!
(golly)
doo do do do dobedo do do scooby didoopity scoobity DO

(get it? get it?)
the mayor dont care if the townsfolk die
he doesnt wanna spoil the fourth of july
hes like "everybody cool it and go for a swim!"
but holy shit here comes that fin saying

JAWS IS HERE
HERE IS JAWS
HE IS A SHARK WITHOUT A CAUSE
(HE WAS IN A MOVIE YOU SHOULD WATCH IT ITS CALLED JAWS)
JAWS IS HERE
HERE IS JAWS
HE IS A SHARK WHO FIGHTS THE LAW
HE WAS IN A MOVIE THAT EVERYONE SAW

JAWS! the shark
lurking in the depths of the sea
on a lark
decides to get rowdy
get real violent
takes a vacay out to amity island
sunshine lotion fun in the sun
BLOOD IN THE OCEAN EVERYBODY RUN
cause its crazy how few fucks this shark gives
hell eat naked ladies
hell eat little kids
oh no
but the one thing keeping the community safe
is i guy named brody and his pal richard dreyfuss
jaws dont know that a storms about to come
he just wants everyone to be his chum!

my favorite harry potter spell is "despacito"

fuck fires

but smoke makes for a pretty sunset

this is so sad alexa play depressacito

my favorite thing about my phone is that sometimes when people text me they come through immediately and sometimes they dont come through for hours and theres no way to tell which is which :)

freedompop sucks shit. at least tracfone never had this problem. ughhh.

i am not intentionally ignoring you or being an asshole. but intentions dont matter, so why bother trying :)